One time my elementary school had a “cow plop” fundraiser where we taped squares into a grid on the front lawn and you could buy a square, like A1 or C12 or whatever, and we brought a cow onto the lawn and the idea was to let it walk around and the person who had bought the square the cow pooped on first would win a big prize—except that about 6 hours in the cow hadn’t pooped and it was looking like it was about to rain and so we had to call it before any pooping happened and we all had to face the fact that we had all been really invested in a cow’s bowel movements for about half of the day and had nothing to show for it.

Milo's very own Dresm store!

Reap the benefits of my extensive wardrobe! High school PacSun veteran, current avoider of retail settings/college student. Let me know if you have any questions, and enjoy!

I’m selling a bunch of my old clothes online that I never wear/don’t fit me/etc. as one way to support myself this summer (aka make rent/grocery shop/occasionally buy a book of poems). Perfect for teen boys/people wanting to look like teen boys. Everything is in great condition, so have at ‘em! I’ll be uploading more in the coming week or so. Woo!

Re-discovered a journal with 50+ (terrible, terrible) song lyrics I wrote between the ages of 12 and 13


“Punk Rocker”— A song about Billie Joe Armstrong’s transition from partier to parent

Punk rocker
He’s doing what he feels
Performing at his shows and
Making pot deals
But now
He’s splitting his time
Between playing with his band
And singing nursery rhymes

Chorus:
Punk rocker Where did you go?
Used to be a partier
Now, you tell your kids,
“Just say no”

So,
He’s still out there
Red tie around his neck
Coaching his son’s soccer game
What the heck?

Chorus x3 

Punk rocker!

“Changes for the Worst”— The necessary “I-won’t-get-good-grades-for-you!!!” punk anthem for twelve year olds everywhere

They’re trying to turn me
Into something I don’t wanna be
Their little teen prodigy
(Yeah right!)
I wish I could tell them to
Shut it
I just wanna fuck it
‘Cause this shit just ain’t what I wanna do

They’re stuffing me into a box
Just because what I think isn’t Orthodox
‘Til I lose my sense of self
Well I think they should just
Shut it
I just wanna fuck it
‘Cause this shit just ain’t what I wanna do

They’re pulling me apart
Ripping out my heart
I’ve got to make them stop
Because even if they don’t
Shut it
I’m still gonna fuck it
‘Cause this shit just
AIN’T WHAT I WANNA DO

“The Sorrows of Being Alone”— Don’t even need the lyrics, the title says it all

“Gag Me Now”— Also self-explanatory

“The Road”— A song about Billie Joe’s experience of being on the road

A minute here
Gone the next
Drinking cheap bear
After a long night of sex

Don’t ask me why
But he stays up and cries
‘Cause he knows what he’s doing ain’t good
He would stop if he could
This is what it’s like when he’s out on the road

One night at a show
He catches her eye
So after the set he decides to go
And give her a try

Don’t ask me why
But he stays up and cries
‘Cause he knows what he’s doing ain’t good
But then he met her
The rest is a bit of a blur
But now he’s married with kids

A few years after he found “the One”
He comes back from band practice
To find his wife and sons
And realizes he was sorely missed

So now he doesn’t cry
And if you asked him why
He’d say his wife’s name
She’s the one that helped him turn back time
‘Cause this is now what it’s like on the road

“Been Deferred”— A song about the media and 24-hour news cycles

Taking advantage
Where you have no right to go
Keep us waiting
We’ll freak the status quo

“Loaded Gun”— Ode to childhood

Chorus:
Whatever I ask gets turned away
No matter what I try to say
Being a child’s about as much fun
As staring down a loaded gun
A loaded gun

Feeling dark and oppressed
Maybe even a little depressed
I know others are off way worse
But sometimes my life feels like a curse

A loaded gun…
Not much fun…
A loaded gun…
Yeah

“The Age of Despair”— Another song about undervalued youth

No one gives a crap
What kids think
They don’t even listen
But automatically think we stink

Chorus:
Only we know
How tough it is to be a kid
In a world where we’re not heard
And requests are automatically forbid
It’s a different feeling
Something in the air
But it makes me able to say
We’ve reached the age of despair

They don’t understand
How tough being a kid can get
All the jobs, friends, and fights
Must be pretty easy to forget

Untitled— I have no idea

My soul to keep
My soul to weep
My soul asleep
My soul is fleep

“Only Real Men Wear Eyeliner”— Another song dedicated to/about Billie Joe

My eyes turn to your face
Automatically I’m floating in space
And just like that, I’m gone
Staring at your leopard-skin thong

Oh, every step you take
Causes my heart to begin to break
It’s a recipe for disaster
My heart beats faster and faster

Chorus:
But I like it cuz…
You make me feel like I’m worth something
With each and every line you sing
Your green eyes and your black spiked hair
All leave me so unaware
Yeah, oh yeah
I just can’t get enough
As you fight a smile, try to look tough
I mean, see, no guy is finer
Only real men wear eyeliner!

It all leaves me a little sad
Seeing your old enough to be my dad
You say, “Adie’s the only one I’ll ever love”
But still I pray to those beings above

Chorus